A rant against supermarkets

I have a theory why. See, in prehistoric or pre-cookware times, human beings were hunter-gatherers. Some did the hunting, some did the gathering. Now I’m not an evolutionary biologist and I’m not a male chauvinist either (ladies please note) but I’m guessing mostly men did the hunting  and the women did the gathering. I present this thesis on the basis of observing how 98% of my female friends love shopping and 98% of my male friends hate shopping. @Sherman, if you are reading this, by the remaining 2% I mean you :) Ok so my theory is that I hate shopping coz I’m a hunter by genetic makeup  (suck it Bambi. I’m coming  for you).

Do any of you like supermarkets? I find them scary, especially the big ones, the ones in which you need directions to get to a 6 pack of eggs. I got lost  in a supermarket once. OK actually more than once but that one I remember coz I had a hand drawn map from my  brother in law to prevent exactly this scenario. It was very simple. He drew it exactly like what I would see when I walk in. But cabbages screwed me. I had an epiphany when I stood clueless in the middle of the vegetables section…I HAD NO FREAKING IDEA what a cabbage looked like pre-cooking!!! Oh wait that was the minor epiphany. The actual one was that supermarkets are unnatural places.
See for a hunter, a supermarket  is a very confusing  place. Suppose you want to buy some Goodday biscuits (One of the tasks my brother in law had assigned to me in the earlier mission). You go to the biscuits section and look for Goodday and what do you see? Goodday lite, Goodday fluffy, Goodday white, this, that what the hell. Immediately my hunter’s instincts screw me. See in the wild, my ancestors had it easy. You walk into the jungle with your badass bow & arrow or sharp sticks or whatever, the prey sees you, gets spooked and runs. As soon as a dumbass prey decides it’s the prey and runs, you recognize that it is the prey and run after it shouting with joy. The roles are clearly defined. But here…they hide in plain sight, alphabetically, mocking you.
Hence we get to my initial proposition. Supermarkets are unnatural. Of course, I know it makes things easier (if you have an aisle-wise sense of direction) and we all need to save time in our fast paced life. But I read somewhere that the biggest joke on mankind is that we keep inventing new things to make things we do easier to do and yet we end up working just as hard or harder, having as less or lesser spare time than before. 30 years ago someone would work a 9 to 5 job making manual entries in a register and now we work a 9 to 9 job even though we have computers. Coz with computers came SAP and all kinds of nonsense.
Just  food for thought. Talking of food, let me head to Safa supermart.
What??? Never seen a hypocrite before?